“Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.” ~Proverb
A few months ago, I moved from the metropolitan east coast to rural Indiana and bunked up with my grandparents to help them sell their house.
The house has finally sold, and now I am faced with options for where to go next. In other words, my future is completely uncertain at this point, and I’m experiencing quite a bit of anxiety over it.
On the real, I’m silently, and at times not so silently, freaking out.
Anxiety is so annoying in that it can be completely paralyzing. It is for me right now.
My anxiety has taken over my productivity and has almost completely shut down my creativity. Also, my sleep is suffering, which impacts my skin, eating habits, and energy. It’s a yucky downward spiral, my friends.
The major bummer is that my anxiety doesn’t solve any of the things I’m worried about, and the blocked energy flow this negative emotion generates only creates more problems. What is a distressed girl to do?
Today I dragged my anxiety with me to my meditation pillow, and had a piece of paper where I quickly jotted down all of my greatest fears surrounding this move that’s upon me in just a few short weeks. I sat for a moment and wrote down anything that surfaced.
What came up was that I am fretting that I won’t have enough money to support my upcoming move, I’m wondering what would happen if my car breaks down, and I’m worrying that I might not be happy in my next environment (and so forth). All valid fears, I would say.
But then I realized that I really needed to dissect those fears further.
Why am I worrying that I won’t have enough money to support my next move? What is the worst that will happen if I don’t? I’d have to move back in with mom and dad? It might not be my number one choice, but I would still be alive and healthy and loved.
Why am I panicking about my car breaking down? What is the worst that would happen if it did? It would be totally unfavorable, but eventually AAA would come pick me up and tow my car to safety. It would delay my trip, but eventually, I would get to my destination, and I would still be alive, healthy, and loved.
Why am I questioning so hard whether or not I will like it where I’m going? As I look back, I cannot think of anywhere I’ve ever lived that I haven’t loved.