Do You Say What You Mean? 4 Steps to Speaking Your Truth
Published on July 8, 2012 by admin · No Comments
What makes you say no when you really mean yes? This happens when we receive an offer or an invitation and our heart says, “Heck yeah!” while our mouth says, “No, thank you.” Perhaps it is the fear of being hurt or rejected. If you do not open to receive, you also do not open to the vulnerability of being disappointed. It could be the fear of doing the wrong thing. That very attractive person you have been flirting with takes it to the next level with a proposition and you find yourself worrying, “What if…” Maybe you like the person more than you would like to admit and you fear the proposition is a physical engagement only. However, what is right and wrong? Who defines it?
From an early age, children learn the boundaries on right and wrong, good and bad. These values are enforced in our social structure from school to church, even in unspoken norms about good girls and bad boys. Yet, who really knows who is making up these moral absolutes? Somewhere between the carefree life of our youth, those first time feelings of lust and love
, followed by the realization that we contribute as much to our heartbreak as the other person did, cynicism sets in.
Maybe you want to ask someone out, but you’re so scared of being rejected or that they will disappoint you that you pass up the opportunity. The other extreme is being so afraid of being alone and lonely that we say “yes” even when we know in the deepest depths of our being that it is the wrong thing to do. How much different would life be, how much time would stop being wasted if we would just be honest from the get go, take some healthy risks, and say what we mean?
Golfers know when they have hit the ball with the sweet spot verses when they slice or shank the ball. The sweet spot is this beautiful, harmonic resonance throughout your body. Knowing the truth is very similar. Your body almost hums. When the truth is not spoken, even if it is a slight deviation, you feel the constriction.
1. Start paying attention to how your body feels
as you make decisions. Take one moment to breathe slowly
and deeply before responding and test your answer internally before allowing it to flow out.