Six excellent reasons not to touch the synthetic stuff, from Adam Brown. Here’s Number 5, but it’s worth reading the rest at Cracked.com:
#5. Because It Absolutely Is Not “Like Weed”
The obscure chemical compound that blazed the path that leads to full-on adults like myself casually strolling into a beat-to-shit liquor store and saying, “I’ll have one Zombie Matter, please” all while keeping a straight face was developed by a Clemson University chemist named John Huffman. He was conducting research on cannabinoids for the U.S. National Institute on Drug Abuse. The compound he came up with was called JWH-018, because JWH are Huffman’s initials and he’s clearly an egotistical prick. You know what else he is? A buzzkill. Check out this quote:
These compounds were not meant for human consumption. Their effects in humans have not been studied and they could very well have toxic effects. They absolutely should not be used as recreational drugs.”
Those sure as hell don’t sound like Bob Marley lyrics, do they? Maybe that’s a standard disclaimer for synthetic drugs developed by actual scientists as opposed to under-stimulated college freshman in cramped dorm rooms, but still, I’ve never seen it stamped on a sack of real weed like it is on the pretend stuff.
Since JWH-018 started making the rounds, reports have been popping up left and right about the health risks associated with synthetic marijuana. Like the three teens in Texas who showed up at a Dallas emergency room with heart attack symptoms, for example. If teenage heart attacks don’t rattle your cage, there’s also the mother of two in Indiana who just straight up died.
Before you hit the comments to call that dead mom an asshole for tarnishing the otherwise harmless name of fake weed, read this. Trust, the guy who wrote that is pretty much making the same argument that you want to and he sounds scientific as fuck doing it. You probably won’t. He eventually comes to the extremely long-winded conclusion that the mother in Indiana probably got a “bad batch” of K2 and, as a result, it killed her.
Fantastic. Now show me the story about a mother of two who got her hands on a “bad batch” of actual marijuana and fucking died. The fact that a “bad batch” can even exist is really all there is to know about why synthetic marijuana and actual marijuana are not like each other at all.
Eventually, JWH-018 was banned along with its chemical brother JWH-073. Strangely, that’s when things got even more bizarre.